as for that large bar of nestle crunch behind the spice jars on the topmost cupboard in the kitchen? the children can pry it from my cold, dead hands.

catapults should never come back into fashion.  many children will end up stranded in neighbouring countries and new immigration laws will have to be set up to accommodate such arrivals.

mantra: 


i must TRY not to leave the children in the woods.  i must TRY not to leave the children in the woods.  i must TRY not to leave the children in the woods.


it's pointless when they know the postcode to the family home.  you'll only get into trouble with the law.